6 days after the IB exams, I could hardly remember what they were like. So occupied had my days been that I managed to sink into a new lifestyle of leisure within no time. 2 posts prior to the one documenting that thought, I mentioned that I would not let these 22 months mar my enjoyment of those brilliant weeks, and to the fullest extent that was how it worked out. Now I stand at a point almost a full 2 months into 2009 and I find some similarities with that period, seeing as it has been 5 days since I left Ladang behind me prematurely. I'm now faced with an entirely new routine, though seamless isn't exactly how I would put my adjustment to it. Keeping it an arm's length away just as you would hold out an unpleasant piece of meat is more like it. Back then, I probably foresaw myself excelling as those before me had. Quite the opposite I'm afraid to report, and while it was a choice I made in an informed, independent manner with zero regrets, it was certainly not what I had envisioned it to be; such is the unexpected way life turns out, as it has been in all my years. The one thing I know is that, out of this, I will know with no doubt that it was the best direction. Each course of action I've taken and each road walked down when I had to make a choice between so many has turned out to be the one where I've experienced most. Same goes for now. I've experienced enhanced BMT in probably the best Coy, a mix of white horse status and driven, vivacious and fierce trainers, been out of course just before field camp and hence went through the most arduous part of being out of training (not one bit of that work I frown upon, for if I managed to help my friends even in the tiniest, though they may not know it, I'm glad; but if I have to hear the words 'jerry can' again I might collapse), worked in Ladang's HQ where things were revealed to me in astonishing depth and detail, did the most boring of duties (sentry) and had all the privileges of a perm staff, and while my posting has a rather undesirable title, I met a superior who has placed me in service doing nothing that resembles it. Uninspiring, but probably better than most (not to say I've not made sure I'm aware of the other options and taken steps to position myself suitably). Amidst all this is the constant thought of not letting the chance to get back onto my original route, say in April. This is the one thing I will need to think the most about, and I shall be devoting the rest of my week to that. Right now, even blogging hasn't helped me figure it out yet, which says something of how intensely unresolved I am.

Spending extended periods of time with the same group of people forms bonds naturally, but with certain conditions, primarily inherent nature and history. That explains why I'm always deeply impacted when leaving groups of people, most recently reflected in the letter I posted on Facebook. These sentiments are a trend I see in my interaction with people in the most significant of my experiences. Somehow I don't quite envision the same where I am now. I'm glad to have met Chong Wee and his new friend (and their temporary superior), my upper study but they'll only be around for a while, and the other 'J' who, with myself and my superior, make up the office people doing actual office work (the LO seems to be no where as versed as us or the other Officers I've met in my time who seem conversant at everything they're doing).

I think I shall refrain from blogging until I've finished resolving that matter above. There are other things to report though, like Friday's Founder's Day, but I think they'll have to wait till late this Sunday, when hopefully I'll be in a more collected frame of mind and the other plans I've committed (some completed) and put into action this week have progressed.