I've developed some new habits in 09. I look at my desktop clock, my watch and my calendar too often. I take aimless walks around parts of Singapore I think I know, but really don't. And I've started reading good books and writing in my expensive but long-abandoned notebooks. All these have very similar causes; I have responded to the year's experiences in ways I never had expected. I truthfully thought I had it all together when 09 began. Wide-eyed and on the crest of having put myself out there, the first few days alone shook the very foundations of my universe. Reality was far less imaginable, and more daunting for it. Did I react appropriately? Sometimes, and sometimes not. All I know is, had it not been for the combination of seeming hopelessness and epiphany, I would not have made it to this point, so much more in zen-esque moderation.
Sitting here typing this as I spend the last day of my nine months looking back on them, events seem to melt into one another, with a few brilliant spots of punctuation. Church Camp and YMLC, in particular, have made this year memorable spiritually. I know there are tons of things I could be using my time, but ministry seems just about right. Similarly, the fourth quarter of 09 will be highlighted by YAM Camp, and possibly FL Camp and VBC if opportunity presents itself.
I suppose a mix of short-termism and macro perspective will serve me well, as we all walk towards the end of a decade of being able to say twenty-o-something.
