Usually the group of MSN contacts which always has someone online is my class, even in the wierdest hours. This is, however, not true in the regular morning hours. When Agi called me yesterday morning I was told I was the only one awake; signing in a few minutes ago, there was also no one online. I've never been one to wake up early out of volition, but I quite like my mornings, especially when they aren't filled with anything. That's probably the reason I bother waking up that early back there too; alone time is one of the few things keeping me sane.
Well it's day 5, and how quickly I've been in and out. I've been fortunate so far in my dealings there, and I think that will continue because of some of the stuff I've done while here. I've told anyone who's asked that, for me, I always felt the anticipation of something dreadful was worse than the thing itself; this time, it was every bit as unpleasant as expected. Nevertheless, 9 weeks and all of 22 months are actually the better end of the stick, especially with all the opportunities available. Plus, I'm doing all I can to go with the PSC route, and I'm eagerly awaiting my new Board Interview date. (PS, I was informed my Harvard app is incomplete. something to do with Secondary School / Dean's Reports, hmm.)
The 2nd day of CNY is usually quieter, and it was nice walking along the estate to and from breakfast with little traffic or pedestrians. At times like these, it would take a huge effort to distill all the thoughts in my head, but I guess before going back there it would do to articulate the important points (no elaboration or clarification, just expression for now) - ethos (the place and the way things are done) and how contrary it is to my person; the choice to do it individually; survive and thrive; 22 months of obligation in the land I've been blessed to be put in but a matter of completing it in a way that is least undesirable and lets me actually live (all the possibilities at each stage I'm aware and becoming aware of); anticipation of it being worse than the actual thing not being accurate now that it's being gone through and how the initial direction (extension of my personality) is no longer the one trajectory I consider.
I plan to make the most out of 2009, whenever it is actually lived and experienced when I'm here.
